A quick run-down should you ever find yourself trapped in a horror movie and would prefer to live to tell the tale.
1. Don’t have sex.
2. Don’t go out with people you’ve just met that day.
3. Don’t go to camp. Especially one where someone was murdered.
4. Find a good hiding place and… STAY. THERE.
5. Always wear sensible shoes, ‘cause you never know when you’ll need to run through the woods.
6. If the town looks deserted, it’s probably because everyone is dead.
7. Don’t be a hero.
8. If you hear something creepy in the distance, like a dog’s yelp cut off mid-bark, don’t investigate.
9. Always check the backseat before entering your vehicle.
10. If your car breaks down in front of a dilapidated gas station, don’t ask a sketchy-looking townie for help.
11. Don’t go into the basement.
12. If you’re trying to buy a house and the real estate agent won’t answer any direct questions about either the history of the home or the previous tenants, DO NOT MOVE IN.
13. Turn off the television (and run away) if a girl crawls out of it.
14. If the walls of your house bleed, do not attempt an exorcism.
15. Don’t act like a detective.
16. Google the location you’ll be vacationing at.
17. Don’t get drunk. Or come under the influence of any mind-altering drug.
18. If you see someone in a mask, don’t assume it’s one of your friends playing a trick on you to scare you.
19. Don’t take a shower.
AND THE LAST AND MOST IMPORTANT:
20. If the call is coming from inside the house, get out.